The Truth

There has been a hole in my blog’s heart, a hole that can only be filled with truth rather than impossible claims about awesome things. In order to fill that hole today’s entry will not be exaggerated. The reason for me doing this blog is for the sake of grades. I am doing entries for my class called “writing for the media”, which is offered at the prestigious Providence College and Seminary.
At times I wonder were this degree will take me, that is my Communications degree. Will I get a decent job? Will I be stuck doing something I loathe because of some sense of duty or will I have a career that I enjoy? My aim, so far in life, is not to become rich and very successful. All I want right now is a steady income I can live comfortably with and as I do not have that I do not feel content with where I am.

Being content where I am has always been hard for me. I see people making a difference somehow, doing something with tangible benefits. They see the fruits of their labours and can be proud in what they have done. Take carpentry versus almost any job at a factory. A carpenter has many different problems they must contend with. A good carpenter figures out solutions to make a house not only functional but also aesthetically pleasing. They look at what they have done and have physical proof that they did something of worth.

In a factory you do your part, pass on the unfinished product to the next person down the line and thus never really see the final product or what impact it has on the customer’s life. This experience may not be shared by everyone, but this is how I felt as a factory employee.

Earning money for doing something I came to loathe seemed as if I was willing to defile my time somehow just to earn money. I became an angry, bitter person, wondering what I was doing with my life and thinking I was wasting it. After one particularly hard week of work I decided the only way to get out of the rut was to jump out with both feet, no hesitation. So I picked up an application for Providence
College and Seminary in an attempt to be at a place I was comfortable with.

Getting a job at a factory, coming to Providence, finishing high school and getting baptized are all things that I thought would make me content, but so far I have felt nothing even close to content. That nagging questions still remains, what am I doing?